Everyone here at weareallbeards.com was excited when we found out that we would get a chance to interview Beard’s lead singer/songwriter Joseph Raiche between his long stretches of almost complete inaction.
We would have printed the interview in its entirety, but much of what he says is rambling and thinly veiled threats. What follows are the best bits. We hope you enjoy.
WeAreAllBeards.com: So, tell us about what the last year has been like playing with a new group.
JR: I don’t understand the question.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Well, it wasn’t really a question.
JR: Then I don’t understand the statement.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Fine. How are things with the new group?
JR: Why, what have you heard?
WeAreAllBeards.com: No, nothing like that. It was just meant to be an icebreaker; a getting to know you softball question. It’s fine; we can just move on.
JR: So, we’re done?
JR: You’re moving on?
WeAreAllBeards.com: No. Not “moving on.” We will just move on to other question. OK?
WeAreAllBeards.com: You were quoted as saying, “It has been rendered the solemn duty of the Supreme Court of the United States, laid upon it by Congress in pursuance of the Federal Government’s power ‘[t]o regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States,’ to decide What Is Golf.”
JR: Yes, many times.
WeAreAllBeards.com: What is it that you mean by that?
JR: I’m not sure what you’re asking?
WeAreAllBeards.com: The quote. It seems to have little to do with music.
JR: I guess, if you look at it from one perspective.
WeAreAllBeards.com: What is the other perspective?
JR: Whom is the other perspective.
JR: You mean, “Whom is the other perspective.”
WeAreAllBeards.com: I don’t think that’s right.
JR: Well, agree to disagree.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Moving on. (At this point Joseph Raiche got up to leave again misunderstanding the idiomatic phrase) Wait. Not moving on as in leaving, just moving on to the next question.
JR: Right. Sorry.
WeAreAllBeards.com: So, you guys have another show coming up?
JR: Yeah, at the Wine Fest. August 27.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Right, but you also have another show just a few weeks later?
JR: Right. We are playing at the Varsity in Vermillion, SD September 16.
WeAreAllBeards.com: That must be exciting.
WeAreAllBeards.com: You seem hesitant.
JR: (long pause) No, I (another long pause) don’t.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Are you worried that your eclectic mix of dance-unfriendly original music will alienate your audience that more than likely is showing up for the fact that they know you rather than actually enjoying the music? And to follow up on that, do you think playing multiple shows just weeks apart will put a strain on those friends who are trying to balance maintaining their relationship with you and their desire to not have to sit through another two hours of songs they can’t sing along to and rhythms that they don’t want to dance to?
JR: Not until right now, I didn’t.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Well, what do you think about it?
JR: It is an oddly specific question, but I will answer it as best I can. Sure, there is an existential dilemma here. We don’t really have time to discuss whether people are “born” to do something. If we assume that people do have a “purpose,” then in that scenario there are people whose purpose is to passively enjoy the work of others. This seems like an absurd idea. Instead, I think it is easier to just assume that we don’t have inherent purpose, and people can do whatever they want. If people choose to come to our shows, we are thankful, but there is no assumption that they “want” to be there. Instead, it is the understanding that they simply “are” there.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Wait, why did you put air quotes around the word “born?” Do you not believe people are born?
JR: I never really got the hang of air quotes. (pause) Or Health class.
WeAreAllBeards.com: So, you mean you don’t care if people show up to your shows?
JR: That is not what I said at all; I am a fragile human being. Fragile.
WeAreAllBeards.com: What do you mean?
JR: I don’t understand the question.
WeAreAllBeards.com: Oh no, not this time. What did you mean?
JR: It has been rendered the solemn duty of the Supreme Court of the United States, laid upon it by Congress in pursuance of the Federal Government’s power ‘[t]o regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States,’ to decide What Is Golf.”
JR: Nods (Note: he actually said the word “nods.” He never actually nodded.)
WeAreAllBeards.com: What makes you get up there on that stage if you seem so conflicted about the audience, about what you are doing, about the music?
JR: To love, and to be loved.
This marks the end of part one of our interview. Part two will be posted when we have time.